Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
I heard some girl say 'yeah he mustve been so drunk he kept mumbling and repeating himself'
And I thought
Fuck I do that shit every weekend
I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
It's that time of night again when I start to think I'm really funny, but no one else is as drunk as I am so they all start avoiding me.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy.
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
I was really excited when I saw a billboard for neverbethirsty.org this morning. Then I realized it was for a church.
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
Randomize
