found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
We talked him into tasing himself.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
At least life still wants to fuck me.
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
Gotta say, self-deprecating Lord of the Rings-themed sex jokes were not on my agenda for today.
Randomize
