Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
The cop busted in, made the music stop, and goes "GUYS LISTEN UP! DRINK, DO DRUGS, HAVE UNPROTECTED SEX, I DONT GIVE A FUCK, JUST QUIET DOWN!" Best. Cop. Ever.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
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