I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
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