so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
i remember getting really pissed off when you wouldn't let me sleep in the garage with your cat.
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
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