rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
they're both probably 7 inches? or 8? I'm shoving a ruler in my mouth trying to figure it out
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
Randomize
