we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
we're making bets on your personal life
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
So his dick was definitely bigger than it looked in all the pictures he sent my daughter.
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
Randomize
