I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
Today's hangover is probably top 3 of all time. Just threw up in an envelope. I'm on the ferry and didn't want to get out to puke over the side because I thought I might fall in the river.
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
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