i seriously hope you fucking die....you are the worst.
SHit! Sorry, sent to wrong person
Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
please come you make the beer taste better
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
At the drs she looked at my back saw your scratch marks and asked "does your back itch a lot?"
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
Man. Apparently I blacked out between the 4th margarita and my air mattress. Asleep in my jeans at 10pm. Mom outdrank me again.
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
Randomize
