she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
I hat to flip my "days since last bad decision" chart back to zero. So...yeah. Sigh.
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
I'm really proud of my unchallenged ability to convert boob guys into ass men
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
I've run into almost every guy I've ever slept with today. It's like they know just how horny I am.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
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