Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
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