i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
this homeless guy just told me to make a wish on his magic plastic spoon but said to be careful what i wish for...
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
I wish dancing around my house in my bra and underwear to Love Shack whilst eating strawberry cake batter was an acceptable form of exercise.
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
Randomize
