its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
please hold off on going into labor, i might need you to take me to the free clinic
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
Randomize
