chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
Randomize