We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
You're the only true friend I have, if true friendship is based off who would be there for me at 4am during a boxed wine crisis.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
its official, you're fucking me on my lunch break. the only thing I want in my mouth is your dick. pick me up at noon.
want fries with that?
I was trying not to blow up your phone, but I'm so horny I think I might die
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
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