Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
Just a heads up that Dad just brought home a new Porsche and the sales girl he bought it from.
Umm okay. What are they doing?
They’re in the hot tub
Can I get divorced when I grow up?
Randomize
