just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
and i think we compared dick sizes, then high fived...
Hangovers were designed by God when he decided that so far he had taken it WAY TOO EASY on me.
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
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