i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
He panicked, you ducked and I was coming off a 3 day coke binge. It was no one's shining moment.
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
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