break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
He's still on the phone with him. This is unnatural. Dudes don't call other dudes just to talk.
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
I'm eating my dinosaur chicken nuggets in the order they would die in the food chain.
My phone really needs to stop auto correcting "library" to "ovary".
They sat at the bar while we waited for a table. When the hostess came to seat us, they were shitfaced, and swordfighting wth chop sticks.
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
What a dumb baby whore.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
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