I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
I think I just sat on my labia. Can I borrow some scotch tape?
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
Randomize
