if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
Come back. Shots need mouths.
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
Randomize
