there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
My roommate got wasted last night and went to the 24 hour Bally's Total Fitness at 3 A.M. He got back took his shirt off, made a protein shake, puked, asked me if he was almost as jacked as Ronnie Coleman then called ME gay before I could say anything and went to bed
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
She gave me head while using a laptop on my stomach to go online. I've never seen a better feat of multitasking.
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
Randomize