Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
Yes. With one-hundred percent positivity I can say yes, I do not want you covered in waffles and syrup when I come home.
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