I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
Are you in a cab?
I'm close- can you order me a bowl of vodka?
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
I'll always remember 2012 as the year I hooked up with countless girls who had the sides of their heads shaved.
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
Emergency. I brought a boy home and we fell asleep, but I just woke up to him peeing against my bedroom wall. So I brought him to the bathroom but he fell over and he's sleeping in the tub. Can I leave him there? Because that's what I've done.
Better the hardwood than the carpet, right?
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