Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
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