Pissed on my Blackberry at the Astros game. Wish me luck explaining that one at work.
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
Latest life lesson : don't accidentally send an "I nutted on her tramp stamp" text to your tattoo-less girlfriend. Oops.
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
Are my feet made of real feet?
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
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