I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
The only thing the cop asked me is..... "how are you still alive"?
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
I just woke up to a ten minute voicemail of you sobbing about the X-Men. Stop getting drunk and watching Marvel movies.
BUT WOLVERINE IS SO TORMENTED AND JUST WANTS TO BE LOVED
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
Randomize
