is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
Ew, dude I just walked in on my boss masturbating in the supply room at the restaurant. He didn't see me so I quickly shut the door and pretended like it didn't happen. And then literally five minutes later he came up to me and cupped my face with his hands and told me what a great employee I was. I got a promotion but I'm fucking scarred for life. I can't stop cringing.
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
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