I saw his package. It spoke to me.
According to Glamour magazine, experiencing sexual pleasure helps you live longer. I am dying an early death.
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
Randomize
