remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
I only drink at bars with bathrooms big enough to have sex in.
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
Good news. His dicks gotten wayy bigger since high school. I love Thanksgiving break.
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
Randomize
