These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
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