Dear everyone that texted me last night wondering where i was. i ended up face down blacked up drunk before i made it to the party. My bad
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
she was pretty much dry humping my leg when her boyfriend walked in. he says "you should probably leave." all i could come up with was "YEAH, I KNOW!"
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
Can I come take down that wallpaper yet? I stopped seeing that dude and I need to occupy my time with something besides getting drunk at bingo night and cussing out old people. Also, i'm not sure on the legal stipulations but I might have, unintentionally, committed grand theft auto at some point.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
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