you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
he might be the rich husband I pretend to love for the rest of my life!!!!
Threesome in a minivan. New low
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
Yeah its great. Whenever we want a new bowl we hand it to Trevor and he clears it in one hit. Definitely one of the benefits to having a swimmer in your circle.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
It wasn't a mystery that it was the pizza cooking in the oven when we stumbled out of the bedroom in a smoke filled apartment at 2am. We are dangerous drunks
I sent my boyfriend to the bar so I could go out tonight and actually get laid..
So vagazzling was a success
I had to cum in my sink.
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