Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
Breakfast-of-shame with my mother. I was in half of a sexy Mad Hatter costume. We had artisan bagels and judgement.
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
I woke up naked on my couch playing a video game I thought I had dreamed about... oh yeah, and someone cut my hair.
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
I almost wrecked my car because of a guy in skinny jeans had a boner
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