he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
The only birthday messages I got from men were from my 8th grade boyfriend and the bouncer at our bar. I think I'm doing something wrong in life.
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
Fyi your toilet is not contaminated. We'd have to scissor pretty hard to pass what I got.
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
No, I'm just drunk and was excited cause a hot stranger bought me tacos.
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
Hahaha wearing a fake moustache in public was the best idea i ever had
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize
