they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
Randomize