Taylor Swift is so right about you.
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
Randomize
