"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
Hindsight: Dressing up in nothing but a bra, booty shorts, and police tape made for the most awkward walk of shame of my life.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
in retrospect i think my mom tried to raise me gay
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
Randomize
