East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
in my defence, i did try to get you to put your shirt back on, then you screamed at me to stop telling you what to do
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
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