she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
Its 6am. Um if my mom for some reasons asks, you stopped by my house around ten and had some wine with me. She is concerned I drank a whole bottle by myself. Woke me at 6am to interrogate..Thank god my pounding head thinks fast.
PS We had chips too. She is less concerned about the whereabouts of the chips but still a good lie always needs detail.
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
I'm pretty sure I just gave myself third degree burns from punching my pizza.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
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