Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
i would totally switch to progressive if they'd let me bang that girl in the commercial.
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
Randomize
