What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
Multi-day drunkenness is to binge drinking as black diamonds are to skiing. They're tough and confusing and you hurt afterwards, but you did it and you probably got an alright story along the way.
I'm so hungover that I just wrote up my will because I'm afraid I'm gonna die. I'm leaving you my bong.
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
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