I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
We had a pink drink in honor of my underwear and apparently I made out with our bartender... a few times
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