I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
My diabetic professor who apparently didn't eat anything all day keeps passing out. I gave him a joint. He's gonna be fine.
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
Randomize
