there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
He has a chalkboard tally in his bathroom of "Me vs. Toilet". He's losing.
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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