I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
Taking advantage of alcohol's depressant capabilities to curtail my fever. SCIENCE!
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
Randomize
