Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
Dude, I woke up in the middle of the night and your room mate was just standing there at the foot of the bed, watching us sleep.. you don't remember me shaking the shit out of you to tell you this?!
This could explain the reason why I've been finding his clothing and keys scattered in random parts of my room..
AND THIS DOESN'T WORRY YOU?!
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
