Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
You owe me a one night stand and a line. Possible an inflatable flamingo as well. And a caesar salad.
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
It's an interesting experience to pee while a bird meows at you.
You need to get out of the house more
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