The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
We left the knife in your bed.
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
Randomize
