everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
To be clear, the next time I wake up with your dick inside me, I will reach down and grab one and squeeze until it pops like a grape. You've been warned.
Hey dude this is some next level no homo shit but im gonna get 2 tickets to the opera and go Hail Mary on this one girl. U take the extra ticket if i fail.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
Maybe it’s too soon to casually tell the boss that I went to Tulsa for some dick last night
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
Randomize
